Are you a SHEEP or a LION?

We have all been there, trying to fit in, either in schools or colleges, maybe university? or even currently at work? whichever one, they provide good examples of us trying to fit in. Don’t get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with this, it is understandable to want to fit in especially in our teen years where at that age our social networks are full of peer pressure and all we want is some sense of belonging. However the problem begins when instead of trying to fit in we yearn to fit in and belong because we don’t want any part of our identity.

I am sure many parents can sympathise with this, but this is no longer an issue of ‘puberty’ and ‘hormones’ or even ‘normality’ (what is normal anyway?), many teens around the world are now killing themselves because of the pressure to fit in, kids as young as 9 years old. The argument that I am making is that why are we not teaching our kids, or even ourselves to stand out from the rest, the characteristics we build in our teens will be the foundation of our adult life. My question to you is that do you want to be a sheep or a lion?

Following the crowd destroys our soul, and our uniqueness,a gift which will only shine if we use it and develop on it. Not only should we teach our kids to be different, but we ourselves should be living example of this. To not follow the crowd, and make it on our own, set about on a path different to the rest, requires strength and courage, it requires you to make fear your best friend, whereas following the crowd requires comfort in the safety in numbers.

It is about changing your views on life and grasp hold of a different perspective, be unique,  have depth, character and strength, but most of all push these qualities onto your kids, brothers, sisters, ANYONE! too many people are becoming exact replicas of everyone else, do not let society do this to you. Acknowledge and awaken your consciousness and unconsciousness on the fact that every institution out there will try to manufacture you to be like everyone else, however YOU and only YOU hold the keys to release you from the shackles that society tries so hard to enforce onto you.

This world needs unique people with powerful ideas, following a crowd ensures that reinforcement of the many shared ideologies, which will impact on your view on life. The institutions I mentioned above come in the shape of schools and college even work forces. There is no escaping of this, the only way of keeping your mind strong and focused on you and your individuality is by arming yourself with the knowledge that this society doesn’t value uniqueness, it values categorisation, realising this will protect you from the socialisation of the mass crowd. Osho states that ‘The greatest fear in the world is of the opinion of others, and the moment you are unafraid of the crowd you are no longer a sheep, you become a lion. A great roar arises in your heart, the roar of freedom’

Thank you for reading this post, until next time…

Appreciation

Appreciation– don’t we all want this? more importantly, don’t we all expect this?  we all want to be appreciated , whether that’s for our kind gestures or for our kind words. It makes us feel as if our hard work has not gone unnoticed and that we are valued for what we have done.

Mostly, I believe appreciation is just about being noticed and valued for our actions, as I have said above, but why? why do we strive to be valued for our selfless act, for stuff we do voluntarily, no-body is forcing us am I right?

The harsh reality of this, you may not what to read, or you may already know, but it is solely down to the individual themselves whether they choose to appreciate your kind acts or not, we have no right to expect this. I see this a lot, mainly in relationships, the girl does not feel appreciated by the boy, and then tensions creep up and then the problems begin which lead to arguments. The same can be said for family relationships also, between brothers, sisters and even between our parents.

The fact is we have no right to demand appreciation, or expect this. If you do something kind for anyone, you do it because you want to do it, many people make the mistake of only doing something nice for appreciation, the sad truth is that you will not always be appreciated.

This post is about changing your changing your views on life, so you see it in a different perspective, my advice , and this is the same advice I myself follow, is that if you do not seek appreciation for your selfless acts, whatever reaction you get you will not be disappoint.

I have many favourite quotes and one of them is  ‘Expect Nothing, Appreciate Everything’.  Always be kind and compassionate towards others, if someone is in need help them, do whatever it takes to make them feel okay and at peace, they may appreciate your kindness, or they may not, the goodness your doing will radiate your soul and beautify your life you will never see people and kindness in the same way again.

Thank you for reading.

Until next time….

I Love Me, I Love Me Not…

Love is a natural emotion, it does not ask for permission on its arrival.

The very first loves in our life are our family. They help us walk and talk when we cannot ourselves, they love us unconditionally. As we grow older we begin to want to be loved by someone other than our family, someone whom we can share our lives with as our parents, grandparents and aunties and uncles have done so.

And so the journey begins in pursuit of love. Many of us will endeavour many heartaches as  a result of not finding someone to love and someone to be loved by. However, one day, this comes true and you feel as if the skies have opened and revealed to you the bright shining stars- you have found love!… or have you?

You will find that movies and books and now even many social networking sites emphasise the importance of  ‘finding the one’, the ‘one’ who will make you happy beyond your dreams. Why are these media linked sources not focusing on building on your own identity? surely that should hold the most importance in ones life, why are we not emphasising individuality and embracing this?… why is our identity only valuable when paired with another… A lot of questions i know, but thinking about these questions and what the possible answers may be in each of our lives is building upon a different perspective on life.

Valentines day has just passed  about a month ago, and I personally feel that is possibly the only day in the whole entire year whereby the pressure to find a ‘my valentine’ is the most powerful. We walk into shops and see cards and gifts, items of clothing all red and fluffy and what happens as the day approaches? many of us feel like utter crap because our friends and families are out celebrating valentines while we are curled up on the sofa watching TV and praying for the day to pass quicker.

Why are we so scared of being alone?, not even our own company is comforting, this really does speak volumes of how we perceive ourselves, and in turn, how others will perceive us. How can someone love you the way you want them to, accept you and want to be with you if you yourself do not love you!. If you cant stand your own company, can you really expect anyone else to?, double standards ring a bell? I think so.

As humans we need to constantly build ourselves, build on our soul, live life to the fullest, all whilst loving ourselves, every inch of you, from the inside and out. We need really do need to change our perspective of what love means, because our first love should be ourselves, everyone else should come second to that .

Remember I said before about the feeling of love to resemble the skies opening and seeing shining stars when you find love? that should the feeling you get every day when you look at yourself in the mirror and see you!!!. We need not to be afraid of ourselves, but embrace our individuality, our identity. Our identity is our own and its not up to be shared by anyone else but you, you are not defined by another person, you define yourself, why? because you love you ! An anonymous author quotes that ‘Our main tool for overcoming this challenge was to be ourselves in a world where they are trying to make us like everyone else’ . Be different! embrace yourself and your individuality!

I hope you enjoyed reading this! until next time…

Positive Mind, Positive Vibes, Positive Life.

Positivity, although  is just a mere word, it holds a very powerful meaning and believe it or not, it really has the ability to change your life. However it is all down to the perspective an individual has on life.

To understand what positivity is, a definition is needed, many dictionaries, journals and books, hold different meanings, most of which narrow down positivity to being a frequent experience of pleasant emotions. Such emotions include; joy, love and pride.  However, these meanings do not even come close in being able to fully justify the true beauty of the word positive.

To me, the word positive is not just a word but a way of life, it is about developing hope when there may not be any. It is about creating and feeling inspired on a dark gloomy day, you see the little speck of sunshine peaking through the clouds?  that to me is positivity.

Feeling positive can at times be a very difficult emotion, because your physically having to feel the emotion, rather than letting the actual emotion come naturally. At times it is understandable when you are unable to do this, for example the death of a loved one or loosing ones job.

Positivity is only 20% about feeling, but 80% about being.

In hard times it is about acknowledging the hardships and heartache, but not allowing this to define you, or change you and your frame of mind. It is about being strong when people would understand if you fall.

Being positive is about improving your quality of life, and your quality of life is very much based on the quality of your own thoughts. If an individual is forever complaining about their life, about how bad it is, how poor they are, how much they hate their job, all of the negativity they are feeling and are expressing will not make their life any better, it will not make them richer, it will not make them happier… An individual who always values life, the good and bad alike and ploughs though a hard days work with a smile on their face, will never think how bad their life is, because the quality of their thoughts are always hopeful and full of positivity.

So today, lets start a fresh chapter, change our quality of thinking, see the good in all and live every day with a smile on our face, within a matter of weeks you will be wondering why you did not adopt this approach a long time ago.

You will still face the same problems as everyone else, but the way you approach these problems will truly beatify your life, and it will beautify you. As Roald Dahl states ‘If you have good thoughts they will shine out of your face like sunbeams and you will always look lovely’.

I hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it.

Until next time..